Places to Practice Self Care in Raleigh to Improve Your Mental Health
August 21, 2019
Most of us have heard the phrase “self-care” whether we have accessed support with a mental health provider before, or not. We read about it in magazines (especially ones that are trying to sell us products) – how we should ‘treat’ ourselves because we’ve worked so hard, and we’ve ‘earned it.’
I get it… because I do it too sometimes.
Sometimes I think things like: I earned that piece (er, three pieces) of dark chocolate
‘I should schedule some self-care time, like a massage or something…’, but then I don’t because life, parenting, work, {insert excuse} gets in the way.
True self-care is an intentional practice, not a quick fix or something we always schedule. It’s about nourishing ourselves.
In her groundbreaking book, Daring Greatly, Brene’ Brown, Ph.D., LMSW says, “I believe that owning our worthiness is the act of acknowledging that we are sacred. Perhaps embracing vulnerability and overcoming numbing is ultimately about the care and feeding of our spirits.”
Self-care does not equal selfish. We, as humans, have to do it in order to survive.
In grad school, my professors drilled ‘the importance of self-care in the care-giving professions’ into our brains. In fact, if we put our own health and wellness as the last item on our list of priorities, it usually means just the opposite where someone else needs to step in and help take care of us.
Why do we resist or avoid self-care?
Replenishing our energy is essential not just to preventing burnout, but in allowing us to thrive. So why is it hard to do?
We receive messages about what it means to be a ‘good human’ from different places including our social group, family of origin, the media, our partner, and we internalize our own narrative about what we do and do not deserve. Whether it’s feeling guilty about wanting to turn down an invitation to a party to have much-needed quiet time, or skimping on sleep in order to get those last few notes typed because you know you just
can’t (or is it “won’t”?) make it happen when everyone in your household is awake. I know- I do it too.
What are the essential elements of self-care? Yours may be different, but I’ve thought a lot about mine and here is what I’ve come up with: connection, setting good boundaries, and listening to/loving my body. I try to remember it is a practice, not a perfect.
Self Care Tip: Connect
Engage in a meaningful relationship with your community.
• Try some meet-ups!
• Get moving! Join a run, walk, or hiking club in your town.
• Volunteer with a great organization like Habitat for Humanity.
• Consider supporting BackPack Buddies or organizing your own local food or clothing drive in your neighborhood. Check out ideas on the Inter-
Faith Food Shuttle site
Self Care Tip: Set Healthy Boundaries
Saying ‘no’ sometimes allows us to recharge and to make sure we are living authentically in line with our values. Here are some tips…Listen to and love your body
• Schedule a massage!
• Or better yet, have a massage therapist come to you.
• Listen to that pain in your neck/back, and visit the chiropractor.
• Check out a yoga class and remember to breathe.
Remember: we can’t sustainably support others and bring our whole self to the table if we are depleted.