Posts Tagged ‘wellness’
How Christian Counseling Can Help You Overcome Fear
April 9, 2020Fear and anxiety are real challenges in life.
Perhaps we face them now more than ever as we continue to live in uncertainty surrounding COVID-19. Sometimes, the thoughts in your head can be so overwhelming and disruptive that it’s hard to sleep at night. It seems like your mind is working in overdrive with no way to calm down.
This is what it’s like to live in fear.
How To Move Forward In Faith
Fear has a lot to do with perception. The Bible teaches us to develop courage and faith to allow us to embrace the unknown. As Dr. David Calvert, Pastor for Creative Arts at Grace Community Church in Angier, NC said,
“The gospel tells us of God’s overwhelming love for us, proved in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus – but sometimes we need help remembering God’s forgiveness and remembering God’s deep love.
Dr. David Calvert
A Christian therapist can help a client remember what is true in the gospel.
How Our Faith Impacts Counseling
Our faith influences our worldview. Therefore, we are open and honest about our beliefs as they influence how we understand healing, pain and hope. However, at Foundations Family Therapy we work with individuals with different perspectives and backgrounds.
“Many people are crippled by shame or the perceived inability to forgive themselves or others, and faith-based therapy is equipped to break down those perceived barriers to help Christians live in ways that bear the fruit of the Spirit,” said Dr. Calvert.
When you begin therapy, your counselor will meet you wherever you are in your faith journey. Faith-based therapy can work very well within the context of discipleship, coming alongside pastors and others making disciples by helping provide key insights and training for emotional health.
Finding God in your struggle
As we head into Easter Weekend, take moment and evaluate your relationship with God. Maybe you’re struggling with your faith and having doubts about God. Maybe you’re wondering “where God is” in the midst of your circumstances. You know he’s there but you can’t feel or sense him and you feel lost, hopeless and disconnected.
Our Christian therapists can help you learn from God’s promises that he will not leave you or forsake you. Christian counseling could help you find hope in your circumstances and identify purpose in the midst of your pain.
3 Tips That Will Help You Talk To Your Kids About The COVID-19 Outbreak
March 26, 2020
Schools are closed.
Ballet, soccer, and baseball seasons are canceled.
There are no playdates or trips to the museum. This is our new normal.
The reality is that we’re living in unprecedented times. With state and nationwide closures and restrictions, many people are left feeling anxious and uneasy- especially children.
And, if you’re a parent, you might find yourself struggling with how to explain the situation to your children without causing fear. Here are some times that can help you talk to your children about the Coronavirus as the outbreak continues.
Help Them Feel Safe
The real enemy is the anxiety surrounding COVID-19 that can be especially difficult for children to deal with. From their perspective, it seems like the world is shutting down around them. Disrupted routines and isolation can really start to take a toll. Help your children adapt to their new normal by creating a safe and healthy environment at home.
Watch your tone when you speak. Keep them from viewing sensationalized
media stories. Find ways for them to safely connect with loved ones and friends through video chat and phone calls. Above all, continue to reassure them that this is just a temporary situation.
Create Routines
Even though we can’t predict the future or know what to expect in the coming weeks, remember that children thrive on routines. Help them create some reliability and consistency in these uncertain times by putting together a schedule for the day.
Let your children know what to expect. Be honest about the time you’ll spend at home and come up with creative ways to not only pass the time, but to enjoy the togetherness!
Lead With Empathy
Children have a lot of emotional needs and it’s important to let them continue to express the way they are feeling. For example, it can be very frustrating that they will miss an upcoming field trip to the zoo. Acknowledge their feelings and frustrations and help them work through these big emotions. In the end, you’re really helping to build their mental resilience.
The days ahead will likely continue to be a challenge for us all as we adjust to our new normal.
The good news is that there’s never been a better time to slow down and focus on what you have. Now is the time to create positive change and celebrate the beauty of togetherness within your family.
Use this time to connect with your family and shower your children with love!
The Mental Health Benefits of Cleaning Your Home
March 2, 2020
Many of us try to do our best to keep up with household chores and cleaning. But, no matter how hard we try, it seems like clutter always finds a way to creep back in our lives. Between work, after-school activities, playdates and everything in between, it’s easy to understand how clutter can sneak back in so easily.
If you dread cleaning, there’s actually a bright side according to psychological research. A recent study discovered that cleaning up messes actually can have a positive impact on your mental health and happiness.
So, if you want to destress, pick up your broom! Here’s why…
Spring Cleaning For Your Mind
The British Journal of Sports Medicine reported that only twenty minutes of physical activity was enough to decrease stress levels! Over 3,000 people surveyed reported that regular housework was enough to decrease anxiety and stress levels. While cleaning isn’t a cure-all, that percentage can really help boost your energy and calm your nerves.
On a deeper level, mental clutter can interfere with our clarity and create emotional baggage. Sometimes, external factors can interfere with your joy in life. Therefore, the problem is not in finding things that bring you joy, but in de-cluttering, your life so unhealthy distractions don’t get in the way.
Decluttering mentally is a little deeper than just getting rid of clothes you don’t wear anymore. It’s about reevaluating your thinking patterns and problem solving methods. It’s about relationships you’ve outgrown or ones that no longer serve you.
Sometimes, you can’t fully appreciate the joys in life because of mental clutter. This year, as you dive into spring cleaning, think about decluttering your mind to create joy, peace, and fulfillment.
Our team can help you identify the joys in your life as well as the challenges that stand in the way. Let’s work together on your journey to thrive!
30 Days of Gratitude
November 1, 2019
November is a wonderful time of year to think about all that you have to be thankful for in life. Our 30 Days of Gratitude Guide can help you reflect on all that you have in an effort to extend thankfulness beyond the Thanksgiving holiday.
The Dangers of Living A Surface-Level Life
October 11, 2019
Have you ever thought about why lies below the surface of your life?
We’re talking about the deep and meaningful pieces that make you unique. In the age of social media and online connection, it’s so easy for us all to see what’s on the surface.
As therapists, we’re blessed to be able to get to really know our clients. In fact, we help them transform from surviving (surface level) to thriving (revealing the unique layers).
When you think about it, the amount of time we are here on earth compared the time of all eternity is like a micro-second. That thought really
helps put the old saying “life’s too short” into perspective. If you feel like your living on the surface of your life just going through the motions each day, here are a few ways you can dig deeper and live an enriched life.
Stop settling
You deserve more! Being clear, honest, and open about your feelings can
add to your happiness and fulfillment in life.
Take action
We all complain- it’s human nature! One of the keys to a happier life is taking action and moving forward. When you develop a negative mindset, you will be stuck that state which is no way to live!
Cultivate your happiness
It’s true! You really can take charge and create happiness in your life. Start
by practicing gratitude and mindfulness. Even on the worst day, you’ll realize there’s always something to be thankful for.
Therapy can also be a great option for those who are looking to live an enriched life. The core belief of our practice is focused on helping people
THRIVE instead of just survive in life. Let’s create your plan for a life beyond the surface level today
3 Places in the Raleigh area to feel close to God
October 4, 2019
Where do you feel close to God?
It’s so important to feel connected regardless of your current circumstances. Let’s look at some local places to feel close to God.
Nature
Immersing yourself in nature and experiencing God’s creation is a great way to feel connected to God. Going for a hike at William B. Umstead State Park, watching birds, looking up at the trees, and tent camping under the stars reminds us of how small we are in His infinite and beautiful creation.
Rent a kayak at Lake Johnson Nature Park and listen for His voice in the stillness. “ 11 The LORD said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by. Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” 1 Kings 19: 11-13.
Church Community
We are stronger in community with others. Some feel closer to God through worship, through hearing scripture, through prayer, or through engaging in small group communities with other believers. There are so many wonderful churches in Raleigh and the surrounding area. Some options are Church on Morgan, Elevation Church, Journey Church, and Grace Community Church just to name a few.
Do some research to see what churches are in your area to connect with others to encourage your faith. 24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10: 24-25.
Right where you are
Feeling close to God can start simply by creating a safe and comfortable space where you are right now. It could be at home or work. It could be in the mornings or during your lunch break with coworkers. Opening your Bible and connecting with scripture and prayer can be the first step. Connecting with a devotional app such as YouVersion is a wonderful way to connect scripture with guided reading and reflection. You can start by reading devotionals alone or with a friend.
If church itself seems like a big step or you have had past negative church experiences, start first with reading a devotional with someone you trust. We are designed to be together so don’t walk alone in your faith. 20 For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18:20.
If you are going through a challenging life season right now, check out ‘Hope When it Hurts’ which is a guided women’s devotional for coping with suffering and difficult times. Also, connect with us at FFT to help guide you and help you reconnect with your faith. Let us walk with you.
How To Talk To Your Teen About Mental Health
August 29, 2019
Teen depression and anxiety are on the rise.
In fact, The National Institute of Mental Health reports that about 3.2 million 12- to 17-year-olds have had at least one major depressive episode within the past 12 months. Many of these teens don’t get the help they need which can cause even more problems.
So how do you talk to your teen about counseling and mental health in a world full of stigma, peer pressure, and judgment?
Discuss Normal Emotions
The teen years are a time of great transition. You might find your son or
daughter exploring their independence and developing a framework for how they view the world. Teens begin to “try on” different values and question why they believe the things they believe. This is a time of great potential but also a time of great stress.
Talk to your children about changes. From hormones to social pressures, teens can experience a wide range of emotions each day. Talk to them to help normalize the conversation around how they’re feeling. Setting up an open plan for communication can provide the support and guidance they need.
Talk About Depression Symptoms
Did you know that about 20% of adolescents will experience depression by the time they are an adult? It’s important to seek treatment for depression as quickly as possible if you are concerned about your teenager. Your teen may feel more overwhelmed than they ever have before. In fact, they may begin to feel hopeless.
As teen counselors, our staff has seen the healing impact of depression treatment. We know your teenager can get better. Therefore, we can communicate this to your child and help them on their path to feeling better.
*It’s important to note that any reference to suicide should be taken seriously. If a teenager has referenced suicide, it is important to seek professional assistance. If you are worried about your child’s safety, please error on the side of taking them to the nearest Emergency Room for an evaluation. The National Suicide Hotline also offers a 24-hour suicide prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255.
Respect Their Privacy
As parents, you want to know that your teenager is OK. On the other hand, teens might have a lot they don’t want you to know about. In fact, most teenagers have some secrets from their parents.
If your teen thinks that their therapist is going to report everything they say in counseling back to their parents, counseling will be ineffective. While our counselors understand your desire to know what’s going on, we also know that the best way to help your teen is to hold their secrets in confidence. Establishing trust is a solid foundation for any relationship.
Foundations Family Therapy offers a variety of mental health services at our Raleigh office. We want to help your entire family thrive.
Places to Practice Self Care in Raleigh to Improve Your Mental Health
August 21, 2019
Most of us have heard the phrase “self-care” whether we have accessed support with a mental health provider before, or not. We read about it in magazines (especially ones that are trying to sell us products) – how we should ‘treat’ ourselves because we’ve worked so hard, and we’ve ‘earned it.’
I get it… because I do it too sometimes.
Sometimes I think things like: I earned that piece (er, three pieces) of dark chocolate
‘I should schedule some self-care time, like a massage or something…’, but then I don’t because life, parenting, work, {insert excuse} gets in the way.
True self-care is an intentional practice, not a quick fix or something we always schedule. It’s about nourishing ourselves.
In her groundbreaking book, Daring Greatly, Brene’ Brown, Ph.D., LMSW says, “I believe that owning our worthiness is the act of acknowledging that we are sacred. Perhaps embracing vulnerability and overcoming numbing is ultimately about the care and feeding of our spirits.”
Self-care does not equal selfish. We, as humans, have to do it in order to survive.
In grad school, my professors drilled ‘the importance of self-care in the care-giving professions’ into our brains. In fact, if we put our own health and wellness as the last item on our list of priorities, it usually means just the opposite where someone else needs to step in and help take care of us.
Why do we resist or avoid self-care?
Replenishing our energy is essential not just to preventing burnout, but in allowing us to thrive. So why is it hard to do?
We receive messages about what it means to be a ‘good human’ from different places including our social group, family of origin, the media, our partner, and we internalize our own narrative about what we do and do not deserve. Whether it’s feeling guilty about wanting to turn down an invitation to a party to have much-needed quiet time, or skimping on sleep in order to get those last few notes typed because you know you just
can’t (or is it “won’t”?) make it happen when everyone in your household is awake. I know- I do it too.
What are the essential elements of self-care? Yours may be different, but I’ve thought a lot about mine and here is what I’ve come up with: connection, setting good boundaries, and listening to/loving my body. I try to remember it is a practice, not a perfect.
Self Care Tip: Connect
Engage in a meaningful relationship with your community.
• Try some meet-ups!
• Get moving! Join a run, walk, or hiking club in your town.
• Volunteer with a great organization like Habitat for Humanity.
• Consider supporting BackPack Buddies or organizing your own local food or clothing drive in your neighborhood. Check out ideas on the Inter-
Faith Food Shuttle site
Self Care Tip: Set Healthy Boundaries
Saying ‘no’ sometimes allows us to recharge and to make sure we are living authentically in line with our values. Here are some tips…Listen to and love your body
• Schedule a massage!
• Or better yet, have a massage therapist come to you.
• Listen to that pain in your neck/back, and visit the chiropractor.
• Check out a yoga class and remember to breathe.
Remember: we can’t sustainably support others and bring our whole self to the table if we are depleted.
How To Help to Your Teen With Life’s Transitions
August 15, 2019
Adolescence is a beautiful yet challenging time of change.
As a result, if you think about all of the social and academic pressures topped with hormonal shifts, it’s no wonder why it can be difficult for teens to adjust!
The good news is that if they seem emotionally unstable, irritable or moody, it’s likely this is all part of normal behavior.
School and Change
As we enter this transitional time of the year with new beginnings at school, it’s important to have a care plan in place to help things go smoothly. Careful organization and planning can help eliminate uncertainty and let your teen know she has a support system in place.
Start by establishing communication. It’s essential to keep communication channels open in order to build a positive relationship with your teen. Even if you don’t always agree, you want them to know that you are interested and that you care.
Another important part of healthy communication is teaching them about mindfulness. It’s easy to get lost in all of the fears, anxieties and “what ifs” that surround the teenage years. Help them learn ways to stay focused and stay present.
Teen Depression and Anxiety are on the rise.
Most importantly, in the rise of teenage depression and anxiety, it’s important to talk about personal safety. Have an open and mature conversation about all of the new issues and challenges your teen might face. Be sure to include topics like sex, drugs, and alcohol use. Talk about all of the new freedoms, responsibilities, and expectations associated with the teenage years and make sure they feel safe.
All parents want to give their teens the tools they need to not only survive but thrive. Family therapy can help with complicated issues and conversations. This is why our team of compassionate therapists- many parents themselves- are here to help your family grow together through adolescence and beyond.
4 Spots In Raleigh That Can Help Reduce Anxiety
August 8, 2019
You know the signs…
Rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing, and racing thoughts… are all signs of anxiety.
When anxious feelings arise, it’s time to reconnect.
Anxiety is one of the most common mental health symptoms, and, for those who suffer, you are truly not alone in your feelings. Some of the most typical treatments for anxiety involve ways to be present in your environment by engaging with your surroundings. This includes using your five senses, deep breathing, and grounding techniques.
So, what does that really look like here in the City of Oaks? Use these local resources and businesses to calm your anxiety.
NC Museum of Art: Whether you are a lover of art or not, this museum truly has something for everyone. On a humid, Raleigh day, you can mosey around the portraits, statues, and expressive artwork at your leisure. Spend time focusing on the colors, textures, and design of each piece. Reflect on your emotional state when looking at the artwork. What is the artist portraying and how do you feel looking at it? If it’s a cooler Raleigh day, spend time strolling in the outdoor art park. Check out the massive Gyre rings and the spacious amphitheater. On your walk, stop and listen. What do you hear? Be mindful of nature all around you. This outdoor park is connected to the Capital Area Greenway System which has trails all over the Triangle so chances are, there is one near you.
JC Raulston Arboretum: This local arboretum has 10 beautiful acres to explore of botanical gardens. Take some deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth and chances are, you will smell something floral near you. As you walk, focus on the weight of your foot pressing down on the ground beneath you and feel connected, centered with the earth. What can you touch around you? A soft petal, a prickly pinecone, or the weight and feel of your camera in your hand capturing the scenery. It can feel refreshing to wander through the gardens but if you’d like more direction, check out the tours and workshops provided there to socialize with others or learn something new.
Cameron Village Regional Library: Although there are many wonderful local libraries around the Triangle, this one located in the Cameron Village Shopping Center, stands out. Explore the shelves of different genres, peruse the artwork, and say hello to the massive knight sculpture greeting you on the 2nd floor. As you meander through this open, two-story space, feel the sun’s rays shining through the large windows and see if you smell a new book calling your name. Pick up a book, feel the texture of the pages, and be reminded of the way it feels to get lost in a good story. This library as well as others in the area offer a wealth of knowledge in not only books but artistic programs for adults as well as storytimes for the youngsters.
Cinemark Raleigh Grande: Sometimes it can be beneficial to take a break from everyday life and immerse yourself in someone’s else’s story. What better way than the movies? Choose where you want to sit online before you come for optimal space and comfort. Stretch out in a cushy recliner with your feet up and enjoy the ultimate surround sound experience. Grab some yummy food to really engage your senses and take time to savor each bite, each flavor. Try to really slow it down and be present with your meal as well as with the show in front of you. Sometimes simply gaining a new perspective can shift your own.
Give one of these ideas a try the next time you’re struggling with anxious thoughts or feelings, and see if engaging your 5 senses at some great Raleigh attractions helps you to feel grounded and calm.
You may also find that anxiety therapy is helpful in reducing your anxious thoughts. We’re here to help, and we want you to move from surviving to thriving in all areas of your life.